Signs That You're Obsessed With the Wheel of Time

• You're as good as Mat in the Old Tongue
• Some of your favourite curses are "Tsag!", "Bajad drovya!", "Blood and bloody ashes!" and "Burn me for a Light-blinded fool!"
• Your response to all complaints is "The Wheel weaves as the Wheel wills..."
• You live by ji'e'toh
• You know 'The Color of Trust' and sing it repeatedly
• You insist that your teacher is Ba'alzamon
• You have dreams of Hopper flying and your friend dicing with Ba'alzamon in Tel'aran'rhiod
• 'Light' seems to have become one of your favourite words
• You have at least one WoT nickname on the net
• You practise the swordforms and consider yourself a blademaster
• When someone asks you to dance, you think they mean dance the spears
• You've memorised the fragments of the Prophecies of the Dragon and translated them back into the Old Tongue
• You call people 'sheep-gutted milkdrinkers' and 'goat-kissing trollocs'.
• You tug on your braid when you're angry
• You can do the Flame and the Void
• You can channel the One Power
• You claim your stupidity is caused by the taint on saidin
• You spend hours searching maps for the names of places that RJ (Light illumine him) used as bases for the place names in Randland
• You think your town/village/city used to be Manetheren
• You have a horse like Mandarb or Aldieb
• When you can't guess people's ages, you think they're Aes Sedai
• Whenever you're in a situation where it fits (or even if it doesn't) you shout "I am no bloody hero!"
• Whenever you're in a situation where it fits (or even if it doesn't) you shout "I am no bloody lord!"
• Whenever you're in a situation where it fits (or even if it doesn't) you shout "I'm no bloody Darkfriend!"
• You complain about people having no honour when they refuse to meet their toh
• You insist on being called "Aes Sedai" or "Asha'man"
• You dance the spears over water
• You tell people that there is a blood feud between you and your enemies
• You use some of Siuan Sanche's lines about fish
• You own a Heron-mark blade
• You won't name the Dark One
• You wouldn't name the Dark One if your life hung in the balance
• You refuse to touch a sword
• You have cadin'sor
• You have said, or made someone else say "I swear beneath the Light and by my hope of salvation and rebirth..." or one of its variations
• You think about which characters your friends are most like
• You think about what Ajahs your friends would choose if they were to become Aes Sedai
• You paint your first two fingernails with blue nail polish
• You refer to your birthday as your nameday
• You insist that there are ten days to a week and thirteen months to a year
• You Listen to the Wind
• You have a voice in your head moaning endlessly over Ilyena
• You have a Great Serpent ring
• When someone complains about a mistake you've made, you say "It's all part of the Pattern..." or "The Pattern is the work of the Light..."
• You wanted to do 'The Color of Trust' for your German verse speaking competition
• On quizzes and surveys when it asks if English is your first language, you write 'NO, Old Tongue.'
• You wonder whether anyone you know is a hero of the Horn
• You convince your boyfriend to grow a beard
• You suddenly become interested in men old enough to be your father
• Rand has promised that you can carry the Dragon Banner or the Banner of Light for him at Shayol Ghul
• You decide Rand has no honour when he tells you that you can't carry the Dragon Banner or the Banner of Light for him at Shayol Ghul because you wouldn't tell him what the Almighty Floder was, and you go around moaning that the world is doomed because our only hope for salvation comes in the form of a guy who can't even keep his sacred word of honour (yeah, I bet this has happened to you, right? ::snirgs:: ALL HAIL THE ALMIGHTY FLODER!)
• You're looking for a foxhead ter'angreal
• When someone says Sunday, you think they mean the Randland holiday
• When someone tells you they don't want to be a hero, you ask them if they'll be there when the flames are hot
• Your friends write letters to you "Sealed to the Flame" (and they haven't even read tWoT...)
• At dances you go up to the guy/girl you want to dance with and say "I saw your eyes and I couldn't help coming over. Will you dance?"
• Your fave rejection line is "I asked you once whether you'd be there when the house was burning down, boy, but it seems you've made a habit of jumping into fires. Now go away and find someone who wants to dance with you!"
• Your favourite random interjection (apart from stuff in the Old Tongue) is "Mat doesn't kill girls, he kisses them!"
• When you want to ask a guy to marry you, you lay a bridal wreath at his feet
• You call your boy/girlfriend 'shade of my heart'
• When your boy/girlfriend breaks up with you, you refer to him/her as Mashiara
• You're convinced you're someone important reborn
• Your girlfriend is a falcon
• You know at least one Wolfbrother/sister
• You tell everyone that you're the Tamyrlin
• You go to theme dances as algai'd'siswai
• You're convinced that you and your two best friends are ta'veren
• You've encountered at least one bubble of evil
• You insist that your enemies are Darkfriends
• As a greeting and a farewell, you say "Light illumine you" and "Suravye ninto manshima taishite" or, if you're in an Aiel mood, "Suravye ninto dareis taishite"
• You would willingly kneel and swear to the Lord Dragon
• You have at least one Warder or you are a Warder
• You can enter Tel'aran'rhiod
• You plan on cleansing saidin
• You name your dog Hopper and think it wants to fly
• Your desktop wallpaper is WoT-related
• You dye your hair red/orange and cut it short with a tail
• You bang your spears against your shield when someone's joke/payout is better than yours
• You have developed an Aiel sense of humour
• You write 'Signs That You're Obsessed With tWoT' lists
• You read 'Signs That You're Obsessed With tWoT' lists
• You don't read 'Signs That You're Obsessed With tWoT' lists because you're too busy reading and re-reading tWoT
• You make a stamp of your favourite WoT chapter icon and use it as your seal
• You make stamps of all the characters' symbols and use them as seals on the letters you write from them to the other characters (Or perhaps that's a sign that you're mentally defective...)
• You have Lan's ring or have engraved Mashiara on the inside of a ring
• You have copies of all the banners from Randland hanging up around your room
• You have read tWoT at least five times
• You don't mind that your boyfriend has two other girlfriends
• You cover your school books with coloured WoT chapter icons
• Whenever you see a guy wearing all black, you insist that he's Asha'man
• The heat doesn't touch you, and neither does the cold
• You wear a piece of crimson cloth with the ancient symbol of Aes Sedai around your head (but you pretend it's not there)
• When your girlfriend asks you to marry her, you go on about how you won't give her widow's weeds as a bridal gift
• You tell anyone who asks that you're from the Three-fold Land/Caemlyn/Illian/Cairhien/Malkier/some other Randlandian place
• You say "Shadow take you, you bloody flaming goat-kissing Darkfriend!" to people you hate
• You wonder if you're going mad when the voice inside your head starts trying to seize saidin
• You got very excited when you found out that you were doing colour and Light in Science and you scrawled 'Light illumine you' in the margins of you book
• Your horse's name keeps changing from Mandarb to Aldieb to Bela to Stepper to Swallow to Pips to Tai'daishar...
• You get a horse and name it Min
• You dream that a guy who looks like Lan is shooting arrows at you
• Your head is filled with other people's memories
• You have at least one 'extra' thing in your head (eg. wolves, the voice of a long-dead madman, your Warder/Aes Sedai, a bunch of dead guys' memories of battles, a damane, etc.)
• You use Randland oaths whenever you need to convince anyone of anything
• If you ever ruled a country, you'd call it Randland, make it the law to live by ji'e'toh, and change the language to the Old Tongue
• You've tasted coin peppers
• You insist that the Seven Towers aren't broken and Malkier isn't dead
• When you had to write an essay on the fall of a great empire for History, you found yourself writing about the destruction of Manetheren
• You refuse to read tWoT aloud in case it mentions the Dark One's name
• Your goodnight to everyone is "Sleep well and wake."
• As a farewell, you say "May you find water and shade this day," or "May you always find water and shade."
• You call people you hate da'tsang and tell them they have no honour
• You're convinced that you're algai'd'siswai
• Whenever you get a new girlfriend, you ask her if 'Daughter of the Nine Moons' means anything to her
• You're becoming very skilled in the subtleties of Da'es daemar
• You have a list of the swordforms
• You know the swordforms by heart
• You go into a weapons store, tell someone who works there that you're the Dragon Reborn, and demand they hand over Callandor
• You introduce yourself as an Aes Sedai of the [whatever... preferably GREEN] Ajah
• You introduce yourself as an Aiel would (clan/sept/society)
• You call wetlanders by their full names
• You always meet your toh
• Your battlecry is in the Old Tongue
• You're the voice in someone's head (although you refuse to admit it)
• You don't trust Aes Sedai (even if you're one yourself)
• You've used a piece of bamboo as the Oath Rod and sworn the Three Oaths
• You never lie, you just speak Aes Sedai truth
• You have bonded a Warder against his/her will
• You think your friend would try to make peace in a waterfeud (and possibly succeed)
• You give the guy you like a Dragon belt buckle and say you had to give gifts to the people you hated most
• You have golden eyes, acute hearing, excellent eyesight and sense of smell and you're married to a falcon
• Your childhood friend turns out to be the Dragon Reborn
• You consider killing everyone who says that Rand will be nae'blis
• You have a hidden supply of ter'angreal, angreal and sa'angreal
• You can Skim and Travel
• You have discovered that you have at least three Aes Sedai Talents
• You have been through a twisted doorframe ter'angreal
• You know how to dance the sa'sara
• You make WoT stickers, notebooks, etc. using coloured chapter icons
• You know and use Maiden handtalk
• You know and use the Saldaean language of fans